Episode 81 Why Staying Confused Is Costing You Confidence

Episode Summary

“I’m confused.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“I just need more clarity.”

Sometimes that’s true.

But often, especially in relationships, confusion isn’t confusion at all.

It’s avoidance.

In this episode, we unpack how staying “confused” can become a subtle form of self-sabotage. Not because you lack clarity, but because taking action would require discomfort.

You’ll learn how confusion protects you from short-term discomfort while quietly eroding long-term confidence. And more importantly, how stepping out of confusion and into courageous action is the very thing that builds self-trust.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in indecision, avoided a hard conversation, or delayed a boundary you know you need to set...this episode is for you.

What We Explore

• The difference between true confusion and avoidance
  • Why “I don’t know” often means “I don’t want to face what comes next”
  • How confusion feels safe but slowly weakens confidence
  • The hidden link between clarity, courage, and self-trust
  • Why confidence comes after action — not before

Key Teaching

Most people believe they need more confidence before they act.

But confidence is built by watching yourself act while uncomfortable.

Clarity → Courageous Action → Evidence → Confidence

When you avoid:

Clarity → Avoidance → Self-Doubt → Less Confidence

You don’t build self-trust by waiting for certainty.

You build it by keeping your word to yourself — even when it’s uncomfortable.

Reflection Questions

• If I had to decide today, what would I choose?
  • What uncomfortable action am I avoiding?
  • Am I truly confused — or am I afraid?
  • What would the version of me who trusts herself do next?

A Reminder

Confusion feels neutral.

It’s not.

Staying confused may protect you from immediate discomfort, but it costs you confidence over time.

You are capable of handling more than you think.

Choosing clarity, even imperfectly, is how self-trust is built.

Connect

If this episode resonated and you’d like support sorting through what’s actually confusion and what’s avoidance, I’d love to help.

Learn more about coaching or join my email list here: Sign me up
Book a free consultation

You can also connect with me on:
Facebook: Trisha Shipley Stanton
Website: https://www.trishastanton.com/ 

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